Angry Angry Attitudes

 A second thing I learned about parenting is how to parent while being human and experiencing emotion. To be more specific, parenting with anger. Growing up in a very contentious household, this was a foreign concept to me, but one I had been growing more and more insistent upon as I grew older and closer to parenthood. I reasoned that if God was my Father in Heaven and treats me with love despite the mistakes I make, wouldn't He want us to treat our own earthly children the way He treats us? Of course!! "Kind looks, kind actions, kind words, and a lovely, holy deportment towards them, will bind our children to us with bands that cannot easily be broken,· while abuse and unkindness will drive them from us, and break asunder every holy tie, that should bind them to us," said Brigham Young. Acknowledge your negative feelings, your anger, but do not let them drive you. As I stated earlier, I grew up in a home where my parents fought and acted on their anger, both with each other and with me. There were many time when my parents would react to an action or words from me with yelling, a slap, a spanking. I felt often like they didn't understand, didn't listen. Sometimes even like they didn't care. While the base goal of me learning not to do something (or to do it) was achieved, it left me with a fear of any contention, memories of a rough childhood, and a lingering fear of telling my parents certain things despite them both being in much better places now. The saying of "honey catches more flies than vinegar" is true. 

towards them, will bind our children to us with bands that cannot easily be broken,· while abuse and unkindness will drive them from us, and break asunder every holy tie, that should bind them to us